Celebrity matchmaker, Jasmine Diaz offers up her relationship advice exclusively on VeryUnmarried.
My husband and I recently had a conversation about family relationships and how they play a major role in a marriage. We are definitely one of the lucky ones.
Our families gel with one another to the point where it’s almost scary. The love between them certainly transcends me as the woman who was married in, and crosses over to my parents, grandparents, siblings, and cousins. It’s just so wonderful! There is something that has to be said about the family relationship.
When you think about dating or marrying someone, the family dynamic is generally disregarded. We look for love hoping to find the man or woman we always dreamed about, but often forget that the family is a packaged deal. It’s a buy one get one free offer!
Many relationships fail because of in-laws. Either mother-in-law or the mother-in-law simply did not like the husband. And while it is terrible, all could have been avoided if the family was carefully vetted. We pre-screen our mates before making the decision to marry, so why not do the same with their family?
If two people are meant to be together, I believe that God will also consider the family. He will not make it difficult for you to live happily as husband and wife. Let’s be honest, He would not set you up like that! Now, you may not be a very spiritual person and perhaps you don’t believe a word that I am saying. But, you can still do your due diligence.
Take the time to really get to know the family before making a commitment. Do they like you? Do you like them? Are they respectful of you and your relationship? How do you feel when you are around them? What about your kids (if you have any)? Make the effort to get to know and fall in love with the family. Trust me, it is worth it in the long run.
You do not have the right to make him choose between you and his mother. You made the decision to marry him despite your relationship with her, so find a way to make it work!
I know this may sound harsh to some, but family is an important aspect of any relationship. So before you say I DO, make sure it means I DO to the family too.
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