Celebrity Black matchmaker, Jasmine Diaz offers up her relationship advice exclusively on VeryUnmarried.
I watched a Cocoa Fab interview today (Mothing Off#10) that just plain pissed me off. Perhaps it was the wife in me, but I do not and cannot respect a woman who purposefully goes after a man who is taken. For whatever reason.
Here is my rationale on this: If a man is willing to leave one relationship to be in another, that should be an indicator that he will not commit to you. So why go after him in the first place? It’s the thrill of the chase! Not the catch.
When you find “the one,” don’t you think the catch is just as important as the chase? I mean, you spent all that time chasing after him, wouldn’t it matter that he be faithful? Don’t you think those qualities count or were you too busy to notice?
As a matchmaker, I am a big advocate of love. And of course, there are times when love finds its way to you when you least expect it; even if he’s married. But you have to know that it is never okay to overstep that boundary. When you meet your Mr. Right, you should expect him to be 125% committed to you. Those rules are not meant to be broken.
Now I am a believer that a man cannot be “stolen” if he does not want to be, but a woman–if she thinks herself to be valuable–will not hold herself in such low esteem. Sometimes what you want isn’t always what you need.
I am not here to judge. If you are reading this and you find yourself to be in this situation, then that’s between you and God. But know this, you are cheating yourself out of something you truly deserve, and that is a man who will love you completely.
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